i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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