It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
