i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
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My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize