Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
All the doctor said was why
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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