CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Are we still banned from the library?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Randomize
