Got a toothbrush?
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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