He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
