Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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