the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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