I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
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