I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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