She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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