operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
