I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
