Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up

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  (517): I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up http://tfl.nu/4pw3
  Replies (7) Good night (767) Bad night (1359)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Ontario

  She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now

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  (416): She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now http://tfl.nu/59pg
  Replies (64) Good night (1161) Bad night (6782)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night

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  (610): i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night http://tfl.nu/1i94
  Replies (8) Good night (666) Bad night (3297)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole

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  (678): better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole http://tfl.nu/f6uw
  Replies (4) Good night (3734) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"

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  (520): she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said" http://tfl.nu/5y3k
  Replies (39) Good night (2757) Bad night (5154)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well

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  (757): I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well http://tfl.nu/14t6
  Replies (7) Good night (4534) Bad night (1327)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous

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  (925): We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous http://tfl.nu/vmkf
  Replies (62) Good night (1005) Bad night (6937)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?

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  (419): You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text? http://tfl.nu/28br
  Replies (8) Good night (4253) Bad night (1169)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.

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  (479): I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics. http://tfl.nu/bo11
  Replies (7) Good night (4104) Bad night (936)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.

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  (678): Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job. http://tfl.nu/5ogs
  Replies (11) Good night (4157) Bad night (893)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.

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  (815): All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time. http://tfl.nu/0jym
  Replies (3) Good night (563) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.

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  (832): I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass. http://tfl.nu/h3v0
  Replies (13) Good night (953) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.

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  (954): You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one. http://tfl.nu/l0kb
  Replies (4) Good night (374) Bad night (786)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing

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  (310): They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing http://tfl.nu/3xrl
  Replies (2) Good night (622) Bad night (293)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest

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  (402): Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest http://tfl.nu/bslf
  Replies (0) Good night (479) Bad night (281)

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