I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
