is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
