see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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