Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
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i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
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That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I think i got beer on your cat.
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