I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
