Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
