It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Enjoy the penises
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
