I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
