I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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