Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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