He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
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The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
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You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.