Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.