I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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