i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
