that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Too much gin, very little bucket
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
