Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
