Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
