i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize