My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
