she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
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