Have some text gold?

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  • a girl who can take/make a jizz joke = keeper.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:03pm
  • wow, way to over think a funny line people

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:32pm
  • So many uptight people on here, geez. This is a website for fun, not life lessons.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:35pm
  • This actually sounds like a convo I would have with my fiance.... ..... Sometimes, he likes to rub my belly when its all over and say something like "Swim towards the light!"... it cracks me up every time xD And we are 23 and 25, we just enjoy humor.. and humor makes an already amazing sex life even better.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 10:45pm
  • this is funny, and 2:03 is right. If I were the guy who got the text I'd just tell her that she can swallow millions more tonight

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:10pm
  • 7:52 I appreciate your use of the word detectivy! lol And you're right! Don't worry about fake v legit. It's whatever. It's just a fun place to get a laugh! And this text is hilarious!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 9:53am
  • people need to lighten up! this is funny!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:06pm
  • AHHAHA! "and I pooped them out" ... I would so say that, too funny!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 1:18am
  • facebook chat between the devil and god respectively

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 17, 09 at 9:06pm
  • What do you think happened first in this sequence of events?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 18, 09 at 11:48pm
  • that shits cute....

    Submitted by somerandomguyftw on Jan 21, 11 at 10:55pm
  • anal licking and midget salad tossing isn't that extreme 5:38-5:39. Your mom and grandmother have done both of them.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 6:55pm
  • I LOVE THIS GIRL!!! HAHAHAHAHA so something I wish I was bold enough to say to a guy!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 4:18pm
    • tip for you.. just say it.. if a guy would get mad about that you don't want him anyway.. unless you like boring, vanilla sex

      Submitted by Wolf32889 on Nov 9, 11 at 10:05pm
  • dude sounds like he regrets this night haha. usually guys would LOVE to think about a time when they came in a girl's mouth.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:20pm
  • and he doesn't seem even remotely interested in her based on his response

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:09pm
  • i cracked uppp hahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 3:17pm
  • thats freaking gross.. but funny as hell. i couldnt stop laughing.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 16, 09 at 12:39am
  • lighten up people its FUNNY

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 5:20pm
  • I think it's funny that everyone assumes she pooped out sperm because se swallowed... Maybe she took it in the ass? Ever think of that?

    Submitted by stephcyanide on Aug 14, 10 at 10:50am
  • I figure she's cool with sex, ended up having an abortion, and he was upset by it because it was his unborn child. So she asks if it bothers him that she swallowed his other unborn children, and he is more of a prude and says "I try not to think about it" and so she follows up with pooping them out. For sure seemed like an abortion convo to me.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 11:10pm
  • the "like" before "millions" really makes her sound young. Sounds like it's the first the time she swallowed or even the first time she gave a guy a Blow Job. The pooping part is funny though, but still, I think 2:09 (2) is right...he is not interested or in slightest amused.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:28pm
  • The less this bitch breeds the better! But she swallows so who cares. Makes me wonder if she inspected her dump to check the jizz was there.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 09 at 8:37am
  • i never thought of it like that....hmm.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 20, 09 at 1:32pm
  • ... what a disgusting bitch id find a new one to suck my cock

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 12:15pm
  • bodily functions and reducing sperm to "unborn children" ALWAYS = funny! I"ve just never thought to mix the two. kudos :-)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 7:55am
  • Vermont teens keepin' it classy.

    Submitted by brifol77 on Apr 13, 10 at 6:32pm
  • LOL! If that's the case I have pooped enough to populate China!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 12:53pm
  • Hey, it's Vermont. Anything is possible.

    Submitted by softball17 on Jul 2, 10 at 3:29am
  • way to let yourself be bothered by something that doesnt concern you. agree with 2:28. probably first time. but im not getting the vibe that shes young, just prude. the guy is probably annoyed by that fact.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:35pm
  • Real classy vermont

    Submitted by meeya007 on Mar 13, 10 at 10:16pm
  • Ohhh, sick burn from 6:55!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 7:32pm
  • "yes, you pooped the ones I put in your butt out, but it was fun putting them in there!"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 7:40pm
  • They're not unborn children. They are sperm.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:33pm
  • Aha 2:09, so true!

    Submitted by jccbray on Aug 28, 12 at 2:09am
  • i'm pretty sure an "immature thirteen yr old" wouldnt be making jizz jokes lmao

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 4:41pm
  • I don't agree with triple posting 10:45 , but yeah i kinda read it as part of an abortion debate.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 09 at 12:45am
  • kinda reminds me of the greek gods

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 1:50pm
  • that's fucking weird.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 3:15pm
  • 9:32 LMAO! Touch the rainbow! Though Taste the Rainbow would work too.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 9:53pm
  • semi funny until the whole pooping thing. I know you poop, but prefer not to mix my sexy mental image of you with my pooping mental image of you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 5:28pm
  • Good point 2:35, but morons trying to bestow wisdom on this site is also funny if you think about it...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:43pm
  • Just an fyi...Cum isn't very digestable. Some chick had to have her stomach pumped because of swallowing. Dangerous stuff lol.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 16, 09 at 2:48pm
  • Take a dump, glaze it with your millions of potentials, let her eat it, and then she can "poop" it. Yummy for her tummy!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 3:59pm
  • I figure she's cool with sex, ended up having an abortion, and he was upset by it because it was his unborn child. So she asks if it bothers him that she swallowed his other unborn children, and he is more of a prude and says "I try not to think about it" and so she follows up with pooping them out. For sure seemed like an abortion convo to me.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 11:10pm
  • HAHAHAH! Fucking Vermonters!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 09 at 5:35pm
  • I figure she's cool with sex, ended up having an abortion, and he was upset by it because it was his unborn child. So she asks if it bothers him that she swallowed his other unborn children, and he is more of a prude and says "I try not to think about it" and so she follows up with pooping them out. For sure seemed like an abortion convo to me.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 11:10pm
  • Its funny. Stop analyzing the fake v. real aspects of these texts. Who cares. This isn't a place to get all detectivy.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 7:52pm
  • semen are not digested they eventually have to be pumped from your stomach

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 17, 09 at 4:22pm
  • You'd piss out his babies, cum is a fluid. Dumb bitch. I know I peed some out this morning. Fucking yummy.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 11:39pm
  • that's stupid. it sounds like it's from a 13 year old or something. just swallow and don't ask questions or talk about it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 1:50pm
  • no this girl sounds like an immature 14 year old she is not a keeper

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 13, 09 at 2:09pm