i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
