Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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