well I can't set my house on fire every night
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize