So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
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The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
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Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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