why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
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Because taping it to the wall would just look stupid...
Your captive escaped...
Your hamster couldn't stand you any more.
Because Chewbaca raided your fridge and you had nothing but cans of sopping wet peaches, so he expressed his displeasure by ripping off some fur and sticking it on the wall (as is custom of his culture).
Captains log: I've lost my toupé and nobody likes me.
because a full scalp isn't PC
I guess they didn't want you to forget about them.