I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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