At least make sure they are 18
Why
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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