Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
