Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
