We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
