I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
so that wasnt chicken after all
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
