Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
