Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
there was a trapeze. enough said
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
