I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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