Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
