And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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